Crushing A Crush
by Gaara of Sunagakure
Summary: Riku's crazy thoughts on trying to deter Kairi's affections toward him....READ AND REVIEW!please..
1. Oh To Joy

**Crushing a Crush**

**By: Finger Lickin Good**

**Disclaimer: **Kairi owns her love for Riku, and Riku owns his "feelings" for her. I own how they express them toward each other. Haha

**Chapter one: OH TO JOY**

You know what the problem with dating is? Listening. When you don't listen to your partner they start to get . . . angry with you. I know this not from past problems, but Kairi got the impression that I, Riku, had a crush on her, Kairi. I think Sora was in on it, but then again he's the one with the shrine . . . Anyway, so Kairi thought that since she "knew" that I had "feelings" for her, that she would make a quiz like thing and read it off to me . . . Confused? To clear it up a bit, it went like this...

Kairi: walks up to Riku with paper

Riku: looks at her weird due to the fact that he was eating

Now that the setting is up, this is what was said . . .

"Hey Riku," Kairi said walking with her hands behind her back.

"...Hi?" I replied with a slight tilt to my head and a confused expression.

"Hmm. Riku do you mind answering a few things for me?" Kairi said just when I took a bite out of my sandwich.

"Shwer," was how my muffled reply sounded, but everyone knows I meant 'sure' and if you didn't...get a job.

"Ok," Kairi continued, "What is your favorite class?"

I looked at her with a dull, unhappy, bored, face. Then the silence...don't you just hate that? I swallowed the food in my mouth and answered.

"Honestly I despise school and every subject." I finally got out.

Kairi, getting some pleasure out of all of this, smiled check-to-check and said, "GREAT!" Oh did I say 'said?' I meant 'screamed loudly and in my ear.' -.- My bad.

I swear, in the brief moment in time, I wished that I could rip my ears off, and after swimming in a big pool of noodles... jump on the nearest plane to Japan, become a ninja, take French, and...

Yeah so then, I must have won a prize or something, because there was a bonus question...Yay!

"What's your favorite color?"

She asked another question? When? Should I answer? I suppose...

But before doing so... I glared at her...she knows my favorite color...a TOTAL STRANGER could figure out that...so I thought that I would be a smart...aleck, and scream something out at random...

"PINK!" I screamed in her ear, trying to repay a favor, but, I stood up in my seat too and half the lunchroom was staring at me...**_Oh-to-joy!_**

The check-to-check grin was starting to run off of her face, I don't think it could get any bigger.

"Ok," she said completing her task-of-the-day, "the last one is...What's your favorite animal?"

O.O Please let that be a joke! I've told her this before also...wait a minute, why all the questions?

"Uh...a wolf..." I said slowly, savoring the moment that I started plotting against her, because these questions mean one of many things. The two I'm thinking are...

1) She forgot everything I've ever told her

2) She's playing a trick on me and is trying to see how long I will go for her silly joke..

This has angered Riku.

"Thanks!" she screams running away, faced toward me, with her hand in the sky. And guess what happened...Mmhmm, she ran into some total stranger, who, I think, knows my favorite color... -.-

.-.-.-.--.--.-.-.-.

Kairi met up with Sora at their little lunchtime-get-together thing Kairi just started.. So Kairi is telling Sora about the ''results'' as of now..

"SORA! SORA! SORA!" Kairi screamed while running full speed toward the table, "I DID IT!"

"Did what?" Sora asked completely lost.

"You know how you said that I should find out more about Riku before I ask him out!"

"How can I forget it was last period,"

"Yeah, anyway, I made some questions up and they all matched my answers!" at this time she was talking so loud and so fast that he didn't completely understand her.

"...So what were the questions?" Sora tilted his head a bit and waited for an answer.

Kairi pulled out the paper she wrote the questions, her answers, and Riku's, on and read it out slowly, and LOUDLY.

"Ok," she said preparing herself, " the first one was 'what is your favorite class?' I wrote I hate school and Riku said he despises school and every subject. How odd is that!"

Sora stared at her, just last week she talked about how she was going to kill me if I wouldn't give her money back, and now she's acting as if I'm some kinda god...no complaints..

"Uh, Kairi? A lot of people hate school and everyone knows Riku is one of them." Sora hated to burst her bubble like that...unlike myself...I live for it. XD

"Ok, but this next question should prove that we're a lot alike. 'what's your favorite color?' I put pink and he said pink also!"

"Uh," Sora said with a sigh, "Riku hates pink, his favorite color is blue or something like that, he was probably annoyed and wanted you to leave him alone."

Thank you Sora for knowing your best friend's favorite color... : (

Ok I'll rephrase what I said earlier, ANYONE could figure out my favorite color...except Sora...he's an idiot.

That's better )

"Well the last question was.. 'what's your favorite animal?' and we both said wolf. Does that count?" Kairi said in a monotone voice.

Sora nodded in disagreement and tried to find a better way of going about this..

HEY GUYS I HAVE AN IDEA! WHY DON'T YOU ASK ME IF I LIKE KAIRI SO I CAN SAY "NO" AND GET IT OVER WITH!

But no...leave it to Sora to make things difficult...

.-.-.-.--.--.-.-.-.

So while Kairi and Sora are thinking of ways to find out if I like her, we're in gym class; but today I will not complain, because we have many choices of activities in which I can avoid Kairi! So now there's the problem..._they_ are in my gym class...mmhmm _they_ as in _Sora _and _Kairi_. Although they think that I _DON'T_ know that they are talking about me...Kairi keeps looking over toward me...-.- So I thought to myself...what the heck...

.-.-.-.--.--.-.-.-.

"...so see what sport he picks and follow as if you like that sport also, ok?" Sora finished his sentence...not knowing that I, Riku, was lurking a few seats behind him, listening...no not eavesdropping...listening very closely for the mentioning of my name, that's all...STOP STARING AT ME!

Kairi nods in agreement to his plan and turns toward the teacher...I figured out right then...and my face was like this O.O and at the same time like this O o so it was more like O.o I guess...that'll do...

_This whole time they've been leaving me out of their conversations, was because Kairi has a crush on me! I can't let her! I wont let her! I need to figure something out and quick before she asks me any more questions..._

(The previous mentioned statement was what I was thinking at the time that it was being thought of...I mean, while I was thinking it.)

For the people who don't know...that was a thought thing...confused...good.

But I didn't just leave and forget about it...no...I, Riku, thought that I should play a little trick on the girl...for my enjoyment only...

I suppose that I shouldn't...it would be too much work...I mean I could because I just don't care what she thinks of me...but then I would have to plan things out and follow through with them. That is just too much work for this simple minded silver haired boy... I'll get Sephy to do it for me...

☻?

Forgive me if something is messed up or wrong. I wrote must of this fiction at 3 a.m. and I've been working on it none stop. I'm almost finish checking over chapter two, and should have it up in a few days or so. Thanks and if you can, review for me and tell me your ideas. (Or bask in my pain when no one says something good about it)


	2. What To Do?

**Crushing a Crush**

**By: Finger Lickin Good**

**Disclaimer:** I've read...not one, not even two, but three fan fics about Riku and Sora being gay with each other... O.o COME ON PEOPLE! LEAVE THE BOYS ALONE! Oh and speaking of which.. you can never have too many bobby pins. )

**Chapter two: What to do?**

_**Flash Back:**_

**_You know what the problem with dating is? Listening. When you don't listen to your partner they start to get...angry with you._**

_**End of Flashback:**_

So that summed that thing up... one of the reasons why I stayed out of view of Kairi and Sora was because...I saw how Kairi talks to Sora...and if she talks to me...THAT MUCH...I would die...like right there...in front of her...it would be all...

Kairi: talks nonstop for hours, at the same time, not really getting anywhere

Riku: pretends to listen...hearts stop...falls over and dies..

Just like that...How can one human talk so much? What would the world do without this hot silver headed teen there to amaze and entertain? More thoughts about Kairi later...

.-.-.-.--.--.-.-.-.

So the next day, it was cold so I borrowed one of Sephy's old jackets...by "old" I meant three days old and by "borrow" I meant grabbed it off of his 'to wear today' pile and ran out the door... it was fun...

.-.-.-.--.--.-.-.-.

I saw Sora and Kairi walking together by the building...awe what a cute couple...maybe Kairi should think about getting with him and leave me alone... anyways... so, yes I did it, I hid. Why, you might ask; because as soon as I hear another question from Kairi about things I've already told her, I will see to it that she doesn't wake up in the morning...or fall asleep tonight...I haven't decided yet...hmm. Well, since I'm hiding I might as well listen to what they're talking about. (As if I don't already know...)

"... and this weekend is the party I've been planning, Do you think that you can convince Riku to come to it?" asked Kairi...

_Look at her... so... happy... and... preppie... O.o No way I'll ever go out with her... she's too... well... happy and preppie... what's more to say...? Sora better take my side on this, there's no way I'm going to that stupid party!_

"Sure," Sora said betraying me, "I'll ask the next time I see him."

_That's it...! I can now do one of two things..._

_1)become invisible and mock Sora because he can't see me_

_2)avoid Sora and Kairi all day or until Sora forgets._

...What? Sora isn't an elephant, although he looks similar to one when he's angry with me, he'll forget sooner or later...

.-.-.-.--.--.-.-.-.

Sora and Kairi: walking down hall together talking about how cool the party is going to be

Riku: hiding behind locker doors, people, walls, and corners trying to stay away from the dreaded question

_How is Sora going to forget about the whole ''ask Riku'' thing if they don't stop talking about it!_

This is a very frustrating thing happening here...

Hmm... maybe I should just... wait, that's not legal... So now I need some loopholes around this setback...

1) kill Kairi

2) beat Sora until he forgets everything Kairi said to him (not too hard or, like Kairi, he'll forget everything I've ever told him and so begins the torture)

3) tell Sora I have plans

4) Tell Kairi I'm sick

5) pretend I like somebody and insist that they come along also

Well those are me choices...I like one and two...

Wait...What the heck am I worried about...If I get invited, fine .I'll carry out with Project Number 0971: Crushing a Crush

It's like a pattern...Projects 0001-0970 were all against Sora and Kairi...

But I'll keep one and two in mind for more consideration. XD

.-.-.-.--.--.-.-.-.

"Hey Sora!" Kairi said appearing out of nowhere, "have you seen Riku anywhere?"

"No, not since gym the other day. Is he here?" He asked with a slightly confused face...

_Oh, but I am...and I'm watching you right now and you just don't... AH! O.O_

"What are you doing back here?" an Oh-so-similar voice said placing their hands on my shoulders.

I slowly turned around, unsure of what was waiting behind me... and sure enough it was...

"KAIRI! DON'T DO THAT!...Why are you here?" I screamed. (What! It scared the crap out of me.)

"Well, I do go to school here and all. Why are you behind these bushes?" she said. Following that was the sheeply laugh she gives when she's nervous. O.o

Oh-to-joy...a double team. I say this because... drum roll please... she got backup from elephant face.

"Riku? Are you hiding from something?" Sora asked. A small smirk shown upon his face. He knew. That...person. : P

"I was...er...resting?" I replied. I sound more like I was asking him if I had his permission to be resting.

"In the bushes?" Kairi added. See what did I say.. double teamed by the crazy pink loving lady and elephant man.

I stood up, bushed the dead leaves and the dirty ground (haha, white stripes song) off Sephy's jacket, put it back on, and started walking away. But before I left the bushes I thought once more...what the heck..

I turned around, grinned, and kicked Sora in the shin. Hah...he had it coming, plotting against me this whole time and not telling me... :'( -tear-

.-.-.-.--.--.-.-.-.

Ok...so that was out of the way. Sure Sora tried to catch up to me so that he could ask me if I wanted to go to the party, but I just ran off and...Yeah. This is getting stupid...I'll let the squirt ask me if I want to go...and I'll just tell him no...that's right..

.-.-.-.--.--.-.-.-.

"Sure!" I screamed answering Sora's question.

"Great! It's this weekend at Kairi's house. All you need to do is show up." Sora said grinning, ever-so big.

Wait...party...at Kairi's? CRAP! I forgot that I was suppose to say 'no' and... ah man! I can't go to that party.

But of course I have to now, for I just made a promise to Sora, and thus, If it is broken, he'll get all moody and angry with me.

I don't care or anything...it's just, nobody else is stupid enough to do every little thing I tell them to do.

What to do? What to do? What to do! WHAT TO DO! ARG!

I guess I'll just go and have fun...OR MAYBE that's what they want me to do...hmm.

Well, there you go, the second chapter. I feel very proud that I've gotten this far on my first fan fiction. I think it's turning out rather nice, don't you? Again review after you've read this. I can't wait to hear everyone's input on this fiction. (Yes I can I lied.)


	3. the party PART ONE

**Crushing a Crush**

**By: Finger Lickin Good**

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing as of now, animals have taken over my room, I never owned the house, and I don't even own the keyboard I'm typing with, I still partly own this fan fiction and Kairi's feelings now belong to me also. -mwa ha ha ha-

**Chapter three: The Party... PART ONE!**

_**I swear, in the brief moment in time, I wished that I could rip my ears off, and after swimming in a big pool of noodles... jump on the nearest plane to Japan, become a ninja, take French, and...**_

To finish that little sentence... write a MEMO TO SELF: get ritalin.

That's better. )

.-.-.-.--.--.-.-.-.

It was the weekend... just about everyone in our home room was coming to Kairi's party, it was the talk of the week. I guess she's as "popular" as she thinks...or the world is just messed up big time.. Well this party is suppose to have everything...food, drinks, a DJ of some sort. Kairi has a pool in her back yard so my guess is that it'll be like a pool party. Well, her parents are going to be out of town this weekend and approved of her "small get together". -.- minor understatement... ok BIG understatement... but whatever, what they don't know won't hurt them... but what they do know will hurt Kairi... hmm.

.-.-.-.--.--.-.-.-.

Sora's putting up some last minute decorations in Kairi's livingroom while she's fixing food, and I'm sprawled on the couch in the den. Yes, I'm already there and such, but that was because Sora drug me along... not by force of course... (I'm a poet). So anyway, I'm laying there and all of a sudden, this happened..

Riku: laying on couch with feet propped up on coffee table, humming to self trying to kill the silence of the room

Kairi: jumps out of NOWHERE and flaps down on my stomach, knocking the newly gasped breathe from my mouth, and feet off of table.

Riku: eyes get BIG and starts coughing due to the fact that air exists no longer in my lungs, and glares at Kairi who had placed her head on my lap

Kairi: giggles sheeply and starts to talk...

_NO! NOT YET! _(haha Riku's phrase must be mentioned)

"Why are you in here all by yourself Riku?" she said, unaware of the mental images, being made in my head, of her death.

"...because...what else is there for me to do? That entertains me, I mean," I answered, now looking at the orange head with a death glare.

"Well, since Sora is in the back finishing up a favor, I'll keep you company," she said. Her face now accompanied by that cheek-to-cheek smile we spoke of earlier. No not the first one.. the one that was about to fall off her face and break into millions of pieces... Yeah that one.

I simply nodded and put my legs back on the table. I didn't want to be rude, and it's hard to make someone that innocent mad at you before she gets what you have in store for her, so I thought that I would wait until the party started to make her keep her distance.

"So... what's new? Since I haven't seen you but once this week I thought that we should catch each other up on what happened in your absence." Kairi said.

See...this is what I was afraid of, I was being nice enough to let me be within her sight and say nothing rude, but after that first remark was finished, I couldn't hear anything because it was so long and LOUD!

"Uh...I... er...was wondering..." Kairi started to ask... No please don't ask me out.. FOR THE LOVE OF GONSHA! DON'T ASK ME OUT!

Sora enters the room... YAY!... he broke the question, now she has to wait until we're alone again, and that's not about to happen anytime soon.

"I finished up in the livingroom," Sora said with a smile of success upon his face, hands behind his head, and eyes closed.

Good thing to, cause Kairi was still on my lap. If he would've opened his eyes before she had gotten up, he would have thought that she and I were... -.-'

" ...so...?" Kairi added lifting her head off of my lap. She was quite irritated that she had been cut off from asking her question.

" Isn't this a good time to call over guests?" Sora asked with a puppy face. Sora thought he was in trouble due to the glare coming from Kairi.

" I guess your right." Kairi's monotone voice has made it's way home. I think she's upset, so I guess I'll break the moment...

" Shouldn't you get that burning food out of the oven?" I said standing to my feet. Yeah, that was the moment killer. I found it funny. Kairi and Sora scrambled to the kitchen.

I stretched and went in the kitchen after them. One, if not both, of them were most likely to get burned, so I didn't want to miss a second of their agony. Evil it may be, but fun also.

By the time I got in the kitchen, the smoke was intense. I covered my face with my shirt and went to see what remained of the chicken. Sora and Kairi were at the sink with the pan completely submerged. I chuckled slightly and walked behind them. Knowing that my presence was unknown, I picked up a cup punch and poured it on Kairi's head, since I was still trying to get back at her for the whole couch thing earlier. She screamed. Painful for Sora, enjoyable for me.

"RIKU!" Kairi screamed again. At this time I knew Sora had a headache because he was standing right next to her.

"...Yes?" I chuckled, followed by my, oh-so irresistible grin. She turned red, literally. My chuckle grew into a loud laughter and she punched me in the side.

" Hey... what was that for?" I said with an innocent-I-have-no-idea-what-you're-talking-about look upon my face.

" You...are...such a ...poop head," she said turning her head and swiping me in the face with her hair. ACK! Hair wacked by Kairi!

Sora coughed trying to make his presence clear and held the food up to me... I was suppose to take it from him and toss it in the trash can behind me... Yeah.. see I didn't catch that. I walked back into the den and got back in my favorite position. Sora tossed a glare my way as I left the room, still offering the prized burned food to me. Kairi left the room also, and wouldn't you know, she can back in the den to pester me some more. This time however she just sat next to me, other than tackle. Sora tossed the food out and entered the den with the phone, tossing it to Kairi. And this was the funny part, she was looking down instead of toward him and it thumped her on the head... Shudder Moment.

"SORA YOU JERK!" she said. Lucky me, she stood up before screaming... so my ears were safe from this demon attack... HUZZAH!

"I'm so so sorry. I thought you saw me." Sora was starting to plead... I think that if they were dating, Kairi would be the boyfriend and Sora the girlfriend.

"Yeah Sora, because I have eyes on the top of my head! You saw me looking down!"

Sora was now Kairi's prey... speaking of prey... prey equals animals... animal planet is a channel on cable T.V... there was a T.V. across the room, and BEHOLD! RIKU HAD THE REMOTE. So.. Yeah you guessed it.. during their heated debate about who's fault it was...

" Shh... be very very quite, I'm hunting wabbits..."

They both stopped... stared... and I couldn't help it... I quoted the show as it was playing...

" Ehh...what's up, doc?" I said while laying down completely, no foot on table.

Childish... yes... funny... very much so... cartoons... I heart.

But before the show was over, they made up and the guests started coming in. FINALLY THE PARTY HATH STARTED!

And wouldn't ya know... I hated 97.8 of the people there... the other 2.2 consisted of Sora, Leon, Yuffie, Cloud, Aerith, and that one chick who has a crush on me... what's her name..Kiama? No wait.. Kiafi? (Mmmm...coffee! If you have a speech impediment.) No wait.. Kiara? No... Kairi! That's it, and Kairi. -.-

So the party has started. People are outside swimming, inside watching T.V. and talking and the rest are doing... things... somewhere... -cough- So I found myself off to the side of the yard staying away from Ansem... He wants me to submit to darkness or something like that... but besides the fact, he scares me sometimes. So while I'm in my little quite place off to the side all by myself, I was thinking about ways to get Kairi off of my back and... Yeah. So I came up with many ways to do so... Well Sephy did it for me because I commanded him to, and BEHOLD! What Riku says is law and therefore, if the law is not done, then the world will fall in to total chaos. So he came up with these...

1) Call Kairi's parents and tell them that something happened to Kairi and that they needed to get back A.S.A.P., thus walking in on the "small get together"

2) Find Kairi's diary and read the most embarrassing thing from it out loud to someone and tell them to pass it.

3) Put up hidden cameras so that every inch of her house can be seen when all put together.

So Sephy had his work cut out for him. Now to pick which to do. Hmm, I don't want her to die (yet) so I'll exclude number one. I don't see what the cameras would do, so I'll try number two. Project Number 0972: Find Kairi's Diary. This plan will take many steps to be completely unnoticed, so I have be quick. Now I'll just ask Kairi were her room is.

"Hey Kairi!" I said while approaching her. Yeah she was blushing again. I should make that a project, make Kairi blush at least 20 times in one day, Oh Yeah.. that sounds like that would interesting.

"Yeah?" said replied while turning away from the previously spoken to person.

"I've never seen your room before, can I take a look?" I asked. I looked innocent, I knew there was no way she could say..

"No. You can't go in there."

-GASP- She interrupted my thought.. that.. pink loving ho!

"Uh..ok?" I said rolling my eyes and walking away. She said no! How could she say no to me!

"Wait Riku!" She's running after me... I guess she changed her mind. Or..something..

"..Huh?" I turned the right way at the right time. The wind picked up and made my hair fly in front of my eyes making me look as if I were a model.. Kodak Moment.

"It's not that you're not allowed in my room, it's just I don't want other people in there. So if you'll just lock the door on your way out it would be most obliged."

"Then I can take a quick peek inside?" I grinned. My plan was being out into motion. It's not her fault that I'm SO irresistible and she couldn't let me act angry with her.

She nodded and I headed upstair with the key to her room swirling on my finger. Ah the power. I felt like if we did get together, that I could have her bringing me anything and everything I wanted, like a trained dog. But that thought has just exited my head since there is NO WAY that's going to happen.

.-.-.-.--.--.-.-.-.

I reached her bedroom finally, I swirled the key around my finger once more and tossed it up in the air. Catching the key and unlocking the door, I opened the slowing, again savoring the moment of her downfall. As soon as the door got about I----I that far apart I just kicked it open. HUZZAH! I hath entered the room. I turned the light on and.. O.O THE ROOM IS PINK!

At this point, I really don't know what I'm getting to. But I will have chapter four up as soon as it's been checked.


	4. the party PART TWO aka HELL

**Crushing a Crush**

**By: Finger Lickin Good**

**Disclaimer: **I own that last chapter... ALL MINE and so far this one is also!

**Note:** Oh you thought that since the last chapter is called "The Party...PART ONE!" that there was a part two? What there's no such thing as one piece... hmm? But Yeah.. that's what's happening here, there's a part two. So go ahead, bask in the light of your victory. -.-'

**Chapter four: The Party... PART TWO (a.k.a. HELL)**

_**Flashback:**_

_**I reached her bedroom finally, I swirled the key around my finger once more and tossed it up in the air. Catching the key and unlocking the door, I slowly opened the slowing, again savoring the moment of her downfall. As soon as the door got about I----I that far apart I just kicked it open. HUZZAH! I hath entered the room. I turned the light on and.. O.O THE ROOM IS PINK! **_

**_End of Flashback:_**

I looked around the room some more, it wasn't half bad, if the walls and furniture were blue and silver, it would be the best room ever. Well, she had posters of stars and models covering one wall and a collage looking thing along the wall near her bed. It was creative and odd at the same time. She had pictures of all her friends hanging on her door, and wouldn't ya know, RIKU DOMINATED THE WALL! Wait.. that isn't good. **OBSESSION!** But then again, all these pictures of me aren't half bad. Hmm, I look good.

But anyway, I locked the door behind me and began to look for her diary. I've never seen her write in a diary before, but she's Kairi, and I know that her girly thoughts had to be placed somewhere because no one would listen to them. So I tore through her room, I looked everywhere for that thing, but it was nowhere to be found. GAH... irritating! So I sat on her bed, looked at the damage done, and looked at the one place that it wasn't... her clothing chest.

_NO! _

But I have to, if I didn't, she might.. So I walked toward the cest and pulled it open. BEHOLD! I see the corner of the diary under her... certain clothing articles. O.o I have to retrieve that dairy, but in doing so, I have to touch her... undergarments, to put in a nicer manner. I found two pencils and moved as much as possible to the side so that I could reach in a grab it.

_HUZZAH! _

It has been retrieved! But wait.. this was a year book! Why is there a yearbook in the same place as her underwear! That's so weird. I put the yearbook back in the chest and sat on her bed once more. Then something scratched the back of my leg. I look down to see what it was and I saw a tiny pink book. I didn't want to touch it, I think I would've rather touched her underwear than an object that was pink. But whatever, I grabbed it and turned it over so that I could see the title. On the front it said "A Heart to Heart Dairy" VICTORY! I grabbed the dairy, stuck it in Sephy's, I mean MY coat pocket, and started toward the door. Remembering that there was a mess, I placed the key on the bed and left through the nearest exit...the window. What? I wasn't about to clean her room.

.-.-.-.--.--.-.-.-.

"Have you seen Riku anywhere? After he went to my room I lost track of him," Kairi asked to Sora kind of confused.

"Isn't that him in the kitchen?" Sora asked.

Yes that was me, but I figured that I shouldn't clean up her room and leave her door unlocked; so if she finds out her diary's missing, it could be anyone. I turned around just in time to see Kairi flying towards me. At that time I wished I had super powers. If I did I would have used laser beams to slow her down then super strength to throw her out the window. BUT I didn't (and still don't). So I stood there grinning, thinking about how great that would be, and all of a sudden, I was pounced on, AGAIN! This time knocking me to the ground.

"Hi again!" Kairi said laying on top of me.

And I was thinking.. _Oh no! Get off of me! What if someone walks in here and sees us like this! They'd think they we were trying to... ewe. _

But I said.. "Hah, Yeah, and oh the ways we meet." I even had a fake chuckle thrown in that statement. She blushed, I died, and Sora walked in... _NO!_

"Uh...," Sora said, very much confused and disgusted by the sight, "What are you two doing?"

That pervert! I know what he was thinking, because I was thinking the same thing about what people would've thought if they had walked in and... Yeah.

Naturally Kairi blushed and for some odd reason.. I did also. She rolled off of me, stood up, and left me to explain. -.- _Thank you Kairi... -mutters-_

I stood up and Sora had his eyebrow raised to his forehead. I was thinking he wanted me to "explain" what we were "doing"

"So...? What were you doing to Kairi?" Sora asked. Then he grinned, and I was pissed. I wasn't about to be nice to Sora after that remark.. Oh no!

"What do you mean what was I doing to Kairi! She jumped on me while I was thinking about... something, and then you walked in! Why would you care anyways! You've been helping her try to get with me!" WHOOPS. I wasn't supposed to mention that part.. saving myself I added, "...haven't you?"

I knew that Sora would lie, so when he shook his head no I thought many things, _Yeah I'm safe from that attack! Yay he doesn't know I know. What the crap! He lied to me just now! That little twirp is going to get it... grr_

.-.-.-.--.--.-.-.-.

We got that out of the way, and the party started to pick up. The "DJ" person that was supposed to be there, never really was, she lied to get more people to come. And I was looking forward to a DJ! ' (

Well, Riku was here to satisfy. Yeah, you guessed it, I controlled the tunes, and I had brought my own collection of CDs to the party. I walked to the radio and what played was horrid! One of my CDs was about to cut in, Haha

Like so:

_(I've gotta crush on you_

_I hope you feel the same way I do_

_I get a rush when I'm with you_

_oh I gotta crush on you a..._

_runs over to CD player_

_trips over chair on the way_

_gets up does quick hair check_

_successfully stops the goo_

_inserts new CD_

_runs away_

_let the rock begin!_

_He calls the mansion not a house but a tomb!_

_He's always choking from the stench and the fume!_

_The wedding party all collapsed in the room! _

_So send my resignations to the bride and the groom...!)_

I believe I've made some people mad for cutting off their song, but they'll get over it. I hate them anyway, plus, isn't My Chemical Romance a lot better than Mandy Moore? Wait, I know her name! Who cares...just to prove I didn't care, I turned it up full blast. I've had better ideas. Some guys were chasing after me so I ran to the front yard and everyone started dancing to the new, better music on the radio. I thought something bad was going to happen so I hung out on the small swing set near me. Again, it was childish, but I heart swings.

.-.-.-.--.--.-.-.-.

An hour or so had passed and almost everyone commented on the fact that I was by myself and acting like a kid. I AM A KID! I'M ONLY 15 FOR CHRIST'S SAKE! Well, right when I thought that everything was winding down and that I was free of Kairi, she made her entrance, but since I was outside, I guess it was an exit. Well anyway, she sat on the swing next to me and started to push herself off the ground. I just kept to myself.

_Please be out here to say that someone killed your cat!_

"It's so peaceful out here," she stated, breaking the silence.

"Well, not really." I replied. At this time I didn't know what point she was trying to make, but I don't even know why I paid any attention her..

"Why do you say that?" ---------------------- Another question from Kairi, everybody!

"Because the music is still clearly heard from here, maybe someone should turn it off."

At this time I was looking at the ground, as if I were too shy to look away. Me, shy? I was acting as if I were a school boy with a crush and too afraid to look her in the eyes. I know I don't like her as more than a friend. She giggled and pushed herself off the ground once more, this time in a steady pattern making herself swing higher and higher. I knew it was a challenge so I started to do the same. After a few pushes, my "grace" kicked in, and I fell off the swing. She, of course, jumped off of her swing, landing perfectly safe on her feet, and ran toward me. Before she got to me I rolled over on my back and stared up at the sky. Even though everything around me was loud, VERY LOUD, I still found myself mesmerized by it. And then, Kairi started to tear up. Oh no, please don't let be her sad tears, the crystalline water molecules that I hated so. When she saw that I was looking at her in confusion, she started talking again.

"Don't worry," she started, "I just remembered when I was smaller I believed the stars were just full of memories. These are tears of joy, not pain."

"Oh.," I replied, gazing once more at the tiny specks of light. "So, what made you decide to have this party in the first place anyway?"

"I thought that I should make myself a 'star' at that school, and I'd be remembered."

Ok.. well we talk about useless things for a good hour, so I don't think that I'll write everything we say.

.-.-.-.--.--.-.-.-.

Kairi went back into the house after she heard a breaking sound. It was a vase that her parents got from their trip to France, hopefully they'd find out one day when I'm not here. Since I was outside by myself, I thought, back to Project Number 0973: Read Diary. So that I wouldn't have to lie about whether I read it or not, I'd hand it over to Ansem. That loud mouth psycho, would tell everyone at the party.

.-.-.-.--.--.-.-.-.

I found Ansem in the middle of the yard, trying to stay hidden in the trees that surrounded it, I placed the book on the table behind him, and called for him. I used my ninja skills so that I wasn't seen... haha not really you wouldn't have noticed me any way. So it went like this..

Riku: tapped on Ansem's shoulder and ran behind trees.

Ansem: turned around slowly, and found the diary on the table

flawless

Of course he picked it up and read it, you would've too. Well my job is done. Ansem works with the school newspaper so if anything is really interesting, then I'll buy a copy. XD What fun

.-.-.-.--.--.-.-.-.

Kairi's party was getting a bit out of control. People were breaking things, nice things from other countries. Now, for the uninvited guests. There was a knock on the door, and I alone, knew who it would be. I saw them as they were walking up to the house They greeted and complimented me, as does everyone I know, and went in for their kill. If you guessed Kairi's parents, your wrong, it's better than that, way better. I just wanted to see Kairi's face when they found her. Sure, I might have given them a picture and the place she was, but she might get lucky. So I thought that I should help hunt her down.

.-.-.-.--.--.-.-.-.

"Kairi!" I screamed entering the noise infested house, "Where are you!" I entered to kitchen..

I see that our guests found her... haha.

"...we had a call in on a neighborhood disturbance," one of the officers said to her, handing her a slip of paper.

She nodded showing she understood and pointed them to the door. Of course now the party was over. Everyone was kicked out of the house and yard. Sora and I stayed behind. Kairi started picking up some of the things that were to be thrown out. Sora helped, and I was on the couch again. I was hoping that Ansem quickly spread that dairy thing. I know he told at least one person, because he said something about a kitten and a fish to me before the police showed up. Well, I bet there'll be something interesting in the school newspaper tomorrow, and nobody will know that it was I, RIKU, who planned it all. I just can't wait until tomorrow. So until then, I'll just tell you about the beginning of my life...

If this fan fiction is starting to suck, please tell me. Well, if you know who My Chemical Romance is, then we can be friends, if you know who Mandy Moore is and you like her... -.- shame on you... just kidding. The next chapter will wrap this fan fiction up.


	5. The Blackmail

**Crushing a Crush**

**By: Finger Lickin Good**

**Disclaimer: **I own not Riku, Sora, Kairi, (thank God for that part) or any other important charter I forgot, they own themselves, But I do own Ansem and Sephiroth. swoon

**Chapter five: The Blackmail**

... and that's how I was born on Destiny Island. Any questions? Good, moving along then...

UP TO DATE:

Today's the day when Kairi's secrets are exposed to the world. Well, the school, but whatever. I hurried up and got ready for school. Today was a special day so I thought that I would wear something nicer than usual. I put on a blue shirt and jeans. I headed toward the bus stop thingy and waited... and waited... and waited... wow this is taking forever.. let's skip ahead shall we. I got on the bus and now I'm sitting in my seat, I own the seat, I sit there everyday and I even wrote my name on the back of the seat in front of it. Everyone knows that it belongs to me. So typically, all the girls gathered around it. Oh Yeah, I'm good. So I'll flirt with as many of them as I can before we reach the school... I've wasted a lot of my time talking to you. Be right back...

.-.-.-.--.--.-.-.-.

So I stepped off the bus, followed by my newest members of the Riku club, and headed toward home room. Now that I've reached my locker, I have to part with my younger fans. I walked in the class. Kairi and Sora were already there, talking about what a bummer is was when they had to end the party earlier than planned. So I walked up and sat in my seat. This time I had no choice but to sit there, they were assigned. But none the less, it was mine and everybody knew it. I sat at my desk, mind in complete blank, waiting for the announcements to be finished. I exited the room early, as I do every day, and I'm now headed towards my first class. I had Science with Kairi, we were lab partners by order of our last names. Kairi's a packrat, and has every piece of lab work that we've done together in her folder. I think it's because my name's on it. But anyways, today we're going to "kill" a frog, and Kairi's having second thoughts about this project.

.-.-.-.--.--.-.-.-.

"I can't cut into this animal if I know that it died for me to cut it open!" Kairi complained.

"What do you want me to do, turn the other way?" I answered being, once again, a smart aleck.

"Could you? Please don't let me hear any sound affects." Now she thinks that I would do this for her? Heh..

"Just close your eyes."

"Ok." She put her hands over her eyes and waited for the ok.

I picked the frog up off of the table, placed it near Kairi's ears, and... _CRACK!_ She screamed, I laughed, I got nudged in the side again, this time it hurt somewhat, and we got kicked out of the lab. The teacher said that he'd be out here to "talk" to us in a minute. Kairi wasn't complaining anymore about cutting the frog, but now she's upset because I broke it's leg... in her ear. : ) Evil Riku.

"I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU!" she yelled

"What? I couldn't help it. It was funny." I replied chuckling while.

She muttered something to herself.. I need to know what.

"What was that?" I'm grinning.

"I...er...I said... I can't BELIEVE that I... invited you?" She was blushing, I know what she really said... something about a carrot.

"Whatever. When is he going to get out here?"

"I dunno." she shrugged.

"If I fall asleep, wake me up ok?" I was kidding of course.

.-.-.-.--.--.-.-.-.

He finally talked to us, we got written up, Kairi blamed me, and I had many laughs while the lecture was going on. So in the end everything turned out great. But the day is winding down, and the paper is getting passed out with report cards. OH THE AGONY OF WAITING! We went back to home room, AVAST! Ansem enters with the paper, HUZZAH! The teacher's passing out the report cards, HURRAY! Everything is in motion to complete Project Number 0974: Make Kairi's end of the year SUCK! I got my report card and newsletter, skimmed though the articles, looking for a title about Ms. Pink over there, and BINGO! I found it. Page 14, Article Six, four inches down, eight inches up, Kairi's crush...WHAT! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! That's not suppose to be there. Please don't be me! PLEASE DON'T BE ME!

_Kairi's Dirty Little Secrets_

_Quoted from Kairi's Dairy_

_Dear Dairy,_

_Today was the WORST day ever. First, this morning I had one of those dreams again. When I woke up, my mom ask what happened and I blamed the dog for the mess. Good thing I use the bathroom before bed, or she would've never believed me. But To make things a little better, I had science with Riku today. He's been slacking a bit in the subject, so picking him wasn't the best thing for my grades, but never hurts to have a partner who is easy on the eyes. Well, yesterday's math test was a snap, so glad that the smartest people in the class sit around me. Well, good thing I have a lock on you or anyone would be able to just barge in a know my little secrets. I guess I'm going to bed now, don't want to look tired for Riku in the morning. T. T. Y. L. Or whenever I can write... _

_Kairi_

_Author Sephiroth Avonej_

_Information for this article was graciously provided by Kairi_

My eyes were HUGE! My own cousin, flesh and blood, turned on me. I forgot he was on the journalism team. Kairi's about to read through the paper. I was all better now that she was going to be mad at Sephy. haha. I will savor this day and treasure it forever.

"Kairi?" I said, I thought... I mite as well give her a clue were to look.

"Mmhmm," she replied, not looking away from her paper.

"Page 14, Article Six." J

"Hmm? Ok?"

She's turning the page, I'm smiling, she found the Article, she's reading it... and in

10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1! BLAST OFF!

She screamed SO FREAKIN' LOUDLY. She looked at me, her face is bloodshot from embarrassment, then she looked at the article, then back at me, then a Sephy in the corner laughing. CAT FIGHT! Sephiroth got his cue and took off out of the room. Kairi followed, beet red with anger. Sora and I are laughing it up and comparing our grades to her's. Project Numbers 0971 - 0974 are completed. I was happy, Kairi's going to be piss off with me when she finds out this was all my doing, and hopefully, ending the crush.

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I Final grades report cardRiku I

I I

IMathD I

IScienceU I

ISocial StudiesB I

IBandA I

IWriting LabB I

IEnglishC I

IReadingA I

IP.E.A I

I-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------I

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I Final grades report cardSora I

I I

IMathB I

IScienceC I

ISocial StudiesB I

IArtA I

IWriting LabA I

IEnglishA I

IReadingA I

IP.E.A I

I-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------I

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I Final grades report cardKairi I

I I

IMathA I

IScienceB I

ISocial StudiesA I

IBandA I

IWriting LabA I

IEnglishA I

IReadingA I

IP.E.A I

I--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------I

I think that Kairi won, and the only reason why her science is a B is because of the whole frog thing. I still LOVE that moment. Well, I suppose you people are done reading the step-by-step process of ruining Kairi's end of the year. You guys can go to sleep, since you couldn't before because I mezmorized you with my ultra super sexiness.

Well that's all I got for this fan fiction, I hope you liked it, I put a week of my life into this story. I will treasure it for ever. Not, really. Yes I put a week of my life in the story, but no, I will not treasure it. Thanks for reading, now review.


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